wednesday songs

I can hear the city bellowing outside

and Wednesday is groaning out

a lingering goodbye

I am watching your breath rise,

grateful for the air in your lungs

they sing the sun to me

they sing

and there is no longing here

not now, in this calm

there is only the bliss

etched on your skin;

permeating my own

and the sinking feeling disappearing somewhere within

I pour my hopes into a

thought

I let it sit

and learn time does stop

after all

– sheila c.

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flame

I dreamt that the gods picked me out of bed

and shook me violently

they had grown tired of my struggle

and breathed bravery into my lungs

i was not born ready for this

but something has changed

it was desire that made me weak

so I will take those parts you claimed

and build a new fire

a new flame to consume the old

and burn the blame

– Sheila C.

 

 

?@$&

it’s hot as a goddamned sauna and thick sweat is collecting where my thighs graze

I’m talking to myself in a beige room, lightly dressed and fully faded.. 

lord, I don’t have the energy to drag a moist toilette across my face to remove my make up 

much less feel like everything is a chasm 

i just.. I just wanted to get to know him so bad! i hid everything and now it’s all gushing over 

why does everything have to be so fucking entrenched in EMOTION 

I’m desperate for a second of nonchalance 

peace 

peace 

fuck.. 

im never going to know peace

– Sheila C