Dear John 

Today as I was crossing the street I hoped that every car that passed me by would offer me the kindness of running me over. 

It’s lunch time here but after choking back days of crushing sadness, I can’t seem to find an appetite. Do you find it hard to swallow? Actually, don’t answer that, it’s probably best that I don’t know. 

 John, can you believe it? That all these people just exist and keep existing as the world crumbles and falls apart? Don’t they know it’s over? 

I remembered that the desert is cold at night and open.. like a barren ocean. This is exactly how I feel, John. Speaking of, did you know The Great Barrier Reef is dying? They’re calling it a “mass bleaching event”. The coral turns ivory white when it dies. It becomes the ocean’s bones and then the ocean’s dust. I’m convinced there’s no respite in this entire world. 

If you do come back, can you promise that I will never find out? In fact, can you disappear altogether? Just vanish? It seems like a lot to ask, I know, but how else am I expected to survive? 

John, I.. I feel as though, you’ve let me walk into this black hole. I wish you had warned me.. 

Yes, yes, I know. 

You’re right. 

I always knew this would happen, I just wasn’t ready to let go. 

– sheila c. 

33 thoughts on “Dear John 

  1. You’ve become prolific of late. I hope it’s because of the National Poetry Month challenge, and not because of brokenness. The last three? Poignant, fragrant, and penetrating. But then, a rose permeates the room when it is crushed. Ever taste rose-petal jam? Delicious, but the same process.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Ahhhhh, Skip! No, no, not brokenness. Ruminating on old wounds, I suppose. Your comment could be published as prose. You wow me with your poetic prowess! I have not had rose-petal jam, it sounds amazing. I don’t even know how I would go about obtaining it but I like look into it. Thank you, as always, for sharing your thoughts. 🙂

      Liked by 1 person

  2. This reminds me of that song, The End of the World by Skeeter Davis. If you haven’t heard it you should look it up. I can see similar heartbreak between the two pieces, and know that pain myself. Keep up the good work 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Oh Gods! The world seems an empty place when your heart is broken. Dead, pointless, useless… I know that feeling. I also know that things will get better, maybe not soon, but things will get better for you, someday..

    Liked by 1 person

  4. life can be made easier through opening your heart to all and just basking in the love of all things without attachment to anything. Reside in the bliss that is your amazing soul and kindness.

    Liked by 1 person

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